"Give us this day our daily bread..."

Bible study today was AMAZING!!! It's always so interesting to see how a certain topic will minister to people in different ways, depending on what they are going thru, how aspects of their past will tint their view, and ultimately how the Holy Spirit prepares and prods their heart. I guess I was at a place in my life where today's topic struck a huge chord in my heart!



We are going thru the book "Lord, teach me to pray" by Kay Arthur. She has us going line by line thru the Lord's Prayer. And as we study each phrase, and compare that with the ways the Israelites, Jesus, as well as believers in the New Testament prayed in scripture, we are slowly learning how to pray properly and powerfully. By knowing His Word and His Promises, we know His will. And we learn how to pray.



Today's study was about the phrase, "Give us this day our daily bread." How many times have I repeated this line?? Yet, I cannot fully capture with words the way that Kay Arthur explained this to us. It hit me so hard. And I believe the Holy Spirit showed me a thing or two about my own attitude.



As I was watching the video at bible study, Kay was recounting the ways she, as a single mother of 2 boys, would trust in the Lord day by day to provide food on the table, gas in the car, etc... And as I was listening to this, I remembered how my own mother, as dirt poor as we were, would also trust in the Lord to provide our needs. I remember how she would include us kids in her prayer times, and allow us to participate in trusting our Provider. Then we would wait, and quite often we would see first hand-how God would indeed provide! Whether is be bags of groceries on the front step from an anonymous giver, or a family from church blessing us with loads of Christmas gifts when we otherwise would certainly have none that year. I vividly remember my parents trusting the Lord to meet our needs. And while we certainly never hit it rich...we definitely made it through with our needs sustained.



So....then my mind starting thinking about how I am with my family. Ooo...not a comforting thought! I don't pray in front of my kids. I don't visibly ask Him to provide our needs. And I certainly don't beckon them to participate in that kind of seeking God. WHY?? Why is it so hard to be vulnerable in front of my family??



I suddenly realized, it's because I so badly want to shield them from the pain and insecurity I experienced as a child/teenager in a very poor family. I'm afraid to allow them to feel the discomfort of 'not having enough.' So, I go overboard. I put up a good front...buying them what they want, taking them where they want to go...and if I don't have the cash, I'll charge it! Whatever it takes to show them that Mom and Dad have control and are able to provide.



How wrong! Not only am I putting up a false front...I'm now realizing that I'm actually ripping them off the chance to see God in action. I'm taking God's role in their life. Ooops! Scary thought! How will they ever learn that we NEED God?? How will they ever learn to be dependant on Him?? And how will they ever see God as their Provider if I'm charging their needs on a charge card?? Or if I'm keeping a pastey smile on my face......while inside I'm trying to work out the situation in my own strength?? This hit me so hard today.


One of the names of the Father is Jehovah-Jirah, which means Our Provider. Matthew 6:25, 34 "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes......Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." God wants us to depend on him day-to-day, rather than hoarding up treasures for tomorrow. That sums up the statement, "Give us this day our daily bread."



Another thing I remember about my parents were that they were so giving! As dirt poor as we were, they would give so freely to anyone in need. We didn't have much, but my mom would enlist us kids to color pictures and homemade cards for a sick church member. Or we'd all walk down the street to bring a meal to a grieving neighbor. Or we'd take swatches of fabric, and my mom would sit with us at the sewing machine and guide our little hands as we sewed the fabric together into receiving blankets that we later donated to a local hospital. And if we truly had nothing to give...then we'd give of our time...spending our Sunday afternoons visiting a local nursing home, where my dad would sit at the piano and play while my mom and all 5 of us kids lined up and sang old hymns to the elderly. Or we would give of our time in prayer. I still remember...'Monday' we prayed for the 'Missionaries', and 'Tuesday' we prayed for the 'Teachers', etc, etc....



I know my parents weren't perfect, and they had their share of frustration and meltdowns, but the general attitude in our home was one of trusting God for our daily needs. Our daily bread. I think that word 'daily' has so much significance in that phrase. Daily means we don't need to look forward to next week or next month. We trust Him for today. In doing that, I think it frees us to give. On the contrary, I find myself awfully tight-fisted with what I possess. Because I am so focused on providing for my family out of my own resources and my own efforts. Lord, teach me to trust in YOU for my daily needs, so that I will be free to give, without hesitation...knowing that you will provide again tomorrow!


Matthew 6:19-21 "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there you heart will be also."

Matthew 6:28-33 "And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."



Ryan has so much more faith than I do at times. I'm so grateful for this! He is the biblical leader of our home, and I find it comforting that I can submit to his decisions to let go and let God, no matter what my own crazy emotions are doing at that moment. And I truly believe that as the head of our home, Ryan has a special God-given wisdom to lead this family in godly ways.



I so desperately want change in our home! And now I feel I have the tools and the perspective to reach for that! It begins with me...1. changing my attitude toward God by trusting Him to be our daily Provider, 2. being vulnerable in front of my kids and including them in the process of asking and giving...according to God's purposes, and finally, 3. submitting to my husband when I start to fall back into old habits...because he is so good at keeping a level head and resting on God's promises.



Phew! Long post, I know!

But, I just had to type this all out, and mark it as a day where the Holy Spirit gave me a huge kick in the pants! Thank you Father for tugging at a heart like mine. For guiding me in your ways and shaping my heart. And thank you THANK YOU for your promises!

"Give us this day our daily bread."