Wild At Heart

This is a blog that I posted on my myspace page about a year ago. But I wanted to share it here as well:

So, have you read any good books lately? I've never been into non-fiction...it can't keep my active mind long enough. But last year I read an amazing book that I heard several people rave about. It's called Wild at Heart by John Eldredge. I'm currently reading The Sacred Romance, which is a companion to the first book.
Wild at Heart hit me on several levels. It talks about the different attributes of Himself that God has placed in us (people). And they differ from men to women. If you're at all a women's activist, you may have trouble agreeing with some of it, but maybe not. Regardless, John Eldredge definitely takes a strong stance...
This is how he puts it....think back to every children's story you heard as a child. In fact, think about almost every successful film you've watched, fictional book you've read, song you've loved...there's one common thread that runs vividly throughout. It's a story that we're all so familiar with. You know it...the story of the hero and the beauty. Why are we so attracted to that theme? What is it in every man that drives him to adventure? In ancient times, men lived their lives on the hunt, facing the world with bare hands and rustic weapons. There was a fierceness that overcame any fear as they wrestled a wild beast for its meat. What is in a man that drives him to take on the mysterious, dangerous waters of the ocean, all for the sake of discovery. And what is it that drives a man to fight to the death, in order to save the beauty in distress?
According to Eldredge, it's a God given fierceness, a piece of God's own identity that he passed down to mankind. And, the scriptures come alive in a whole new way when one reads the stories and the psalms in this context. God himself has a fierceness and unrefined crave for adventure that is shown time and time again throughout scripture. Think of the blood, the battles, the bravery in those stories of old. And think of the ultimate sacrifice he paid on the cross for his bride, the church. It's a love story of its own. And both the old testament and new testament are interwoven with this amazing story of God's passion for adventure, and His tireless pursuit of his people to return to His heart.
What of modern day men? It seems that today's culture has stripped men of the fire and adventure that begs to be pursued. Today, men no longer ride horses bareback, with the strength of muscle beneath...they are told to drive luxury cars with all the amenities. They are no longer cowboys looking for a fight...they are told to be "nice guys." Men no longer take on the dangers of night in a hunt for food for their family...they work in enclosed office cubicles behind desks and are told to wear ties and polished shoes. Where are our heroes? They are afraid to stand up and rescue the beauty, because so many women are screaming "We don't need men, we can do it on our own!" Even in the religious setting, men are told to stand up straight, hold their hymnal and be quiet...in essence, push that craving for adventure aside. But, the thing is, there is still a longing in every man's heart for that adventure. Men are left to live vicariously by watching favorite sports teams duke it out. They huddle in bars with the guys, hoping to find a sense of manhood and toughness. There is a wildness in them that can't be tamed, even by a refined society, because it's a wildness that was placed in them at creation by their Wild Creator. According to Eldredge, men will continue to live unsatisfied until they come before their Creator and begin to live the adventurous, wild life He intended.
OK, so you women are saying, "where do we fit into the picture?" Well, just as men crave an adventure and long to be the hero, so do women crave to be swept up in his adventure, and be the beauty...desireable and worth rescuing. Women have been assaulted for generations by our culture. We have been hurt by fathers, uncles, boyfriends, in very ugly ways. And the message is..."you're not worth rescuing." After all, if you were valuable, you wouldn't have been violated in the first place. The media tells women they aren't nearly desireable enough, without the latest product (or, now, surgery). So, we chase after those men, with whatever it takes...seduction, mind-games, whatever. We desperately want to be pursued, cherished, and seen as desireable. God has given us this part of our nature. He, too, waits for that "romance" with His people. That's why He referred to His church as His bride. Read through some of the Old testament books and you'll find God pleading with His people to turn away from distractions and idols, and return to His heart. He desperately loves us. And He tirelessly pursues us. He's not just a distant authority, like religion often suggests. The entire theme of the Bible is His desire to have relationship with humanity and move on their behalf in life.
So, it isn't any wonder why the theme of favorite stories hasn't changed throughout history. We are the way we are because our Creator wove into our very being different aspects of Himself. This has helped me understand my husband in a whole new way. I'm no longer the whiny wife when he wants to watch a football game. In fact, I'm the one buying him the NFL Sunday ticket. Because I understand that it's not just about watching a game. It's about he as a man connecting with the action and adventure on the screen. And I no longer protest if he wants to go hunting with the guys, or purchase a Playstation game filled with bullets and blood. I understand the crave inside him for a battle.
It's also helped me understand my two boys. I get it now, why they turn everything into a gun or a sword. Even a graham cracker somehow gets gnawed down into the shape of a weapon. I used to implement a rule in the home...no playing guns! (That's Discovery Toys' stance, after all). But now I realize that without that inner desire for adventure and a fight, how will they ever grow up to defend our country? I now encourage "adventures" for my boys. They regularly get dressed up in their ninja costumes, or pirate suits and stick those swords in the back of their shirts and guns in their pockets and hop on their bikes in search of an adventure (ie: walk with mom). We explore every inch of our neighborhood for bad guys and wild beasts and secret hide-outs. It's at these moments that they are in their element! And I can see a flash of fierceness in their eyes as they wrestle with Daddy on the floor, cheek against scratchy cheek, skin against skin, trying with all their strength to defeat this larger nemesis. It's what they thrive on!
I've learned how important it will be for my little Marina to grow up having little date nights with her daddy. He's the very first man in her life, and (like every little girl) she desperately needs for him to lavish her with compliments and security so she grows up believing in the beauty and value inside herself. And that's a dynamic that mommy just can't duplicate on that level...only daddy can make that happen.
As for me, I've come to understand myself much better as well. I get it now...why I'm so drawn to soap operas and chick flicks about the mousy girl who wins the hunk with her witty charm, because he saw that she is worth cherishing. You know, cheesey stuff like that. And I realize why I appreciate Ryan so much, when I walk down the steps for a date night, and his eyes pop out as he whistles at me (yeah, even after 10 years and 3 kids). Because he's really telling me, you're still the beauty that I want to fight for. How cool is that!
And lastly, it makes me want to know my Maker even more intimately. To explore more of His eternal character...the depths of His wildness and the amazing romance He longs to share with His people.
That's it guys! Hope I held your attention. And go get that book! There's so much more interesting stuff than I could even fit here!